C▲THERIOLOGY

dead

2011-06-19T01:24:00.002+08:00

This space is dead but I'm pretty much alive.

The holidays just zoomed by like a jet in the sky.. in fact, it doesn't even felt like its the holidays. I spent three weeks in school doing endless work, especially my art coursework. Times are hard but we all know that its our final lap this year so work hard people.

GOODNIGHT

And they lived happily ever after.. no?

2011-04-30T01:21:00.002+08:00

Hehe, I managed to watch then kiss on the famous balcony live on telly.. TWICE! Well that's good enough for me since its one of the highlights of the Royal Wedding. I caught up with Princess Catherine walking down the aisle and the Royal couple doing their wedding vows on Youtube. Thank God for technology.

The most anticipated wedding dress was the McQueen label and I am sure Alexandra McQueen will be so proud of Sarah Burton up in the Heavens. Although I still feel that Princess Catherine's (oi what, i like to overuse the princess term because my name is CATHERINE) dress can still be improved but Princess Catherine (hehex) wore her best accessory! Her smile of course. The wedding overall wasn't as grand as the wedding of Princess Diana and Prince Charles back in the 1981. Princess Catherine and Prince William rode in Rolls Royce instead of a Golden Carriage and maybe it was still the wedding dress that wasn't as grand as compared to Princess Diana's long train at the back. But still, you cannot deny that lace looks good on her slender body.

Well, this young newly weds have dated for 8 years unlike Princess Diana and Prince Charles with their 6 months of dating so I really hope that their marriage lasts forever in the blessings of the Lord and just like any other fairytale, they will live happily ever after.

FFFFUUUUU

2011-04-28T22:08:00.002+08:00

I cannot watch the Royal Wedding live anymore because I will be having my tuition during the time that it will be broad-casted. I am bitter and so disappointed. I have been looking forward to tomorrow for so long... Imagine how magical it would be..

Well I guess I'll just watch the rerun somewhere on TV or online.

I am really sad.. really really sad..

WILL&KATE

2011-04-27T23:05:00.003+08:00

I JUST CANNOT WAIT FOR THE ROYAL WEDDING ON FRIDAY!!!

IT'LL BE BROADCASTED LIVE ON THE BBC WEBSITE AT 6PM GMT +0800

ITS LIKE A FAIRYTALE

p/s: Kate Middleton will be named Princess Catherine after their marriage.

AHEM* GIIIIGGGLEEEEEES* :):):):):):):):)

Its this time again...

2011-04-27T22:25:00.004+08:00

1027PM
I cannot believe I'm even on my computer, wow.

OK ITS THIS TIME OF THE YEAR AGAIN, EXAMS.

Advanced papers starts tomorrow with English and hihihihihihihihihi I'm here bloggin' and tumblrin'. Digging my own grave is so fun. I have only 6 subjects to study and yet I still cannot do it well, whow, how embarrassing.

Anyway, I am not here to rant about me lacking in discipline to study again but to share with whoever that's reading on how I motivate myself @ home. Being motivated is really important in everything you do especially in STUDYING. Since I'm taking the O'lvls this year and I have this dream of getting into TP's Visual Communication Course (I have been dreaming since Sec 1), I have to STAY motivated to study all. the. time. just to get the desired results for me to be able to get into the course. Recently, about a month ago, I started sticking little notes and paper on my walls. They were all scribbled with things that will drive and motivate me to continue or start on my work. Like this:

Yes, I have my school's motto "Onward and Persevere" on the wall. Its not silly, at least I think think it's silly. I think its a great quote to live by. I really really want to get into VC that I would be really really depressed and probably never forgive myself for not working hard when I didn't make it. Of course, its not only the L1R4 they are looking at, there will be an interview too. They'll browse thru your portfolio and then make their final decision.

So its very important for me to stay motivated.

And I hope I really can STAY motivated all the time.

Wish me luck and the best for everything.

Now good luck and all the best to the people who are having their exams.

xoxo.

Easter

2011-04-24T20:08:00.009+08:00

Happy Easter Day!

Today I had my confirmation as a Christian and now I'm considered a full member of Christianity and an adult in church lol. I can finally take the Holy Communion and need not go up when the Reverend bless the children. Oh, not only me, Brandon, Huien and Zijia had their confirmation too! Awesome 16yos. It's the work of the Holy Spirit and the love of the Lord that form what we are now today. Our lives are anew and so is Jesus's. The Saviour that died for our sins on the cross has risen from the dead and is alive once again.

I'll just bomb whatever photos I'm tagged with on FB here and OMG I just realised didn't take single picture with Rachel today but she took an Instax of me while being blessed by the Reverend but I appeared just to be a head mob of hair and my dress happened to be black so... pfft.

- - - -

i love yall (:

HIATUS

2011-04-11T23:41:00.011+08:00

11:42PM

Thank you Peizhen for the Sticky rock candies! #SoSingaporean prease.

I skipped school today because I wasn't feeling well this morning. The first thing I did when I woke up was rush to the toilet and puke my guts out. Not a surprise since my stomach's been feeling weird for these few days. Went back to sleep and woke up again @11 to puke again. Luckily that was the last time. Didn't go to the doctors because it would be a total waste of time and I probably won't eat the pills anyway so its a waste of money too.

Spent the rest of the day on the computer, which was not a very good thing to spend time on since I have the whole day free to do revision etc. Ah, bad choice, wasted my whole day on it. Nothing fruitful was done, not even walking Lek. Should've do some art coursework manz, time is running out. MYE starts in 20 days, not counting the advance papers but before that, something crazy and exciting is going to happen to me and that is.. ... ..

....

......

GOING TO FUCKING UNIVERSAL STUDIOS SINGAPORE AND STAYING 2D1N AT RESORT WORLD SENTOSA BITCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hell yeah, my aunt invited me to this ultimate experience and she's sponsoring yay. Its like a blessing in disguise. I can have a chance to go to USS and stay at RWS (omg the infinite pool!!!) without me paying BUT the down side is that I will be having my Mid Year Examinations right after it. Well usually I'll spend the day before the exams rushing through my revision and probably not sleep but now, I won't have time for that anymore because I'll be at RWS or USS enjoying myself (if I know I had sufficient revision for MYE already, if not...).

SO I decided that I'll start my revision now so as to enjoy at ease when the day arrive. I even drew up a revision time table! Looks like I won't be on the computer until my exams end then! My birthday post just have to wait so will checking my Tumblr updates. I am so grateful to have this opportunity or else I don't think I'll ever have a chance to experience RWS and USS at this age.

Oh look its 1234AM. Time for me to sleep and prepare for the day ahead.

So.. c u guise in a month? I hope my blogging vibes still stays!

xoxo

"mood-swings"

2011-04-11T01:20:00.006+08:00

1:20AM

Why am I still sporting "Sleepless Sunday"?

Hey guise, I am currently doing work with my computer on at 1AM going. This two combination should never go together but I do it anyway. I have no sense of self control. I am here because felt a sudden urge to blog about YESTERDAY which passed an hour and twenty five minutes ago. I make time to blog about my feelings instead of my birthday... wat.

YESTERDAY was Marcus's birthday and we celebrated it @Fish&Co @SSC, thank goodness that I am rich for this period of time because of birthday angpows or I probably will not be participating in that celebration. Btw I went shopping the day before and although WTFlea ain't that awesome, I still managed to spend err... $70 in town. Splurge. Back to topic - celebration started off with everybody in high spirits but it spiraled down towards the end. Fish&Co: Not that great, $20 fly. All our Fish&Chips were too oily and first time in a long time, I didn't finish my food. One or two person in the group start to have a little displeasure with the pricing but meh, it passed. Virgin visit to Fish&Co was madly disappointing. Then two went home after lunch.

So here's this: the ratio of Malay to Chinese in the group is 1:6 so inevitably she will be feeling left out because of language issues. I am well aware and I tried my best to converse in English but the language issue still managed to bother that dear girl and so she kept to herself to the rest of the day. Not talking, not responding, not participating in anything, no smiles no nothing. Sound familiar? Yep, I am very sure everyone has a friend like this and this kind of attitude annoy the HELL out of me. Feeling unhappy? Voice out then, why keep to yourself? Ask you what happen, you also don't want to say so what the fuck am I suppose to do? It will not only affect you, it affect the people AROUND you. FYI I am not specifically aiming at that one individual, I am talking about this irritating common attitude that I abhor.

There are several names to this attitude. Emo, mood-swing, etc etc whatever. They are contagious. Nobody wants a celebration to end up being an 'emo' fest just because one person was unhappy. N to the O thank you. Well usually when people go into their 'emo' mode, I will usually ignore. If you want to wallow in self-pity, hatred, angst or other shitz instead of choosing happiness over it and have fun, please go to a corner and don't come near me. You'd be lucky if I even bother to ask you what the fuck is wrong with you (but of cuz not in this phrasing lah) because I'd probably in a good mood to even care about your emo-self which shouldn't even exist in the first place. You can choose happiness instead, dumbass.

- - - - - -

Harpy Birthday Marcus.

"but we mean no harm"

2011-04-08T21:47:00.004+08:00

9:48PM

Sorry the birthday post have to wait.. I need to unload stuff off my chest but I still wonder who reads this blog anyway?

- - - - - -

I know myself as somebody who cannot handle responsibilities well and that's why I avoid them when I can but this year, I was given chance to be the Vice Chairman of my class. Not a big deal you might say but it really IS a big deal for me. Throughout all the years I spent schooling, this is the biggest role I have played. I did not volunteer myself, I can say that my class chose me. When people pick me out of all to become one of their leaders, its pretty clear that they can see something good in me and believe that I would do a good job. I.. tried to.

Setting a good example is the Number 1 thing that all leaders should do. Well, Sijia, my class chairman did it consecutively for 4 years. I bet her conduct should be what? Beyond Excellent I guess. I am not the best person whom people can look up to, I always get myself into trouble. Late coming for example. Its never ending. Being a VC can really mould me into a different person but sometimes I just go astray. Most of the time I forget how I should be acting as a VC and that would be the core reason why I feel guilty when trouble becomes a friend again. It all goes down to this phrase - "but you're the vice-chairman." So what if you think you did wrong? You're the vice chairman. Responsibilities just become greater.

I am very sure that some of my classmates, school mates or even teachers were shaking their head in disappointment when they saw me standing in front of the school during morning assembly on Thursday. I know my cousin did. Very depressing although most of the time I would very love to smack the people who shake their heads at me right in the face because most of the time I know what I was doing. This time... I hung my head in shame. I have no excuse and no explanation. Defending myself only to be made useless and pointless.

The idea of skipping afternoon assembly and spending the time hanging out in the classroom never really occur to me until that day when I was feeling quite adventurous (at this point i really want to eat some century egg congee zzz). What harm can skipping assembly do? Turns out my first time would have such a bad outcome and it did more harm than I have ever imagined. I even tweeted that skipping assembly is one of life's joys. That is if I wasn't caught for doing so. I have not only ruined my class's reputation, I have also let my FT and classmates down. "SEC 4E class some more!" That was what they kept on harping on. It really sucked.

To my dear classmates: I am really really sorry. None more of the negative labels would have been put on you if wasn't for our actions. We thought that it would be harmless (okay, now at this point I feel like eating pasta). As your VC, I feel strongly for myself. Should have set a good example right? Now I know. I seek your forgiveness and history will. not. repeat.

The school or Mr Tan our FT still don't know what to do to us so I can say that our punishments are still pending? I can accept whatever they choose to do to me but please don't make us stand in front of the school again. So hard for me to keep a straight face when I see stoned faces in the masses and for some reason I feel like defecating.

I hope this post sets it clear...

p/s: Ms Soo is really ugly IMHO.

#1

2011-04-04T22:31:00.006+08:00

Birthday this year was really a blast. Never in my life I have so many celebrations before. I am so grateful to everyone of you who are involved spending time planning surprises, chuping in money for the surprises, spending money on presents and last but not least, remembering my birthday! Birthday 2011 was really really a very memorable one; I cried so much.

I need to pen everything down before I forget them all but there's no time for a full birthday post yet so I'm going to blog about the first day of my three-day celebration. Its the simplest and it only required 5 minutes to compose.

- - - - - - -

FIRST OF APRIL TWO THOUSAND AND ELEVEN

SAKAE SUSHI DINNER BUFFET WITH TOHPEIZHEN

END.

THIRD APRIL

2011-04-03T01:35:00.003+08:00

Happy Birthday to me.

Gonna have a birthday post soon.

3 days worth of celebration!

Motivation

2011-03-31T23:36:00.004+08:00

11:37PM

Miaow. Twas a long day today.

Well I was suppose to be suspended out of class today because I was late but some how I managed to walk past both the security guards and the discipline teachers without being stopped and asked to fill up the late coming slip! I know this is wrong but I really don't want to be suspended nor skip school again. It would be a disappointment to my classmates since some actually had the courtesy of morning-calling me. This, I think, will be a classic tale to tell my kids in the future.

There was a motivational workshop today after school and it was quite enriching but whether to imply the study strategies taught, still have to depend on self-discipline.

ITS FRIDAY TOMORROW!!!

Dozers

2011-03-30T21:49:00.008+08:00

10:04PM

Received an encouragement bookmark from my cousin and there's Lek in the pictures after his walk yesterday. QTPIE

SCHOOL WAS AWFUL. I swear everyone was fighting their wits out to stay awake during lessons. We were all zombies. Lessons after recess is one of the hardest thing to cope in school especially if you had your tummy almost full from food. Our eyelids were super heavy and it gets heavier by the second.. THEN SUDDENLY YOUR NAME WILL BE CALLED BY THE TEACHER TO WAKE THE FUCK UP. This name calling activity can go on forever.

I have this problem. I cannot go through a test or examination without dozing off while writing. WHILE WRITING. R U SIRIUS. My paper will be then full of random lines and ink dots because I rested my pen on it. My time will be wasted and I'll end up not completing them. The only way I know to keep me awake is also by dozing first until my brains wake up and starts functioning normally. Yep, this happens all the time. I sincerely think that there is something wrong with my brains. I would really want to go for a CT Scan to check if there's a stone or tumor pressing against my nerve or vein in my brain that cause me to act like that. For all I know, this kind of behavior is definitely not common.

On a lighter note, birthday celebration starts on Friday! I'm going to have a Sakae Sushi buffet dinner with Toh @Scape! I have been craving for their Cold Soba since forever. Saturday will be spent with my clique from school. They are planning on something but they wouldn't tell me and that really make me all jittery and excited. They wouldn't even tell me where we are going.. good, I love the mysteriousness. Then the actual day, Sunday APRIL 3RD... Nobody actually booked me on that day actually but I heard that Chrysther's got a plan.

THANK GOD FOR THESE WONDERFUL PEOPLE IN MY LIFE.

So grateful that they even bother to remember my birthday.

Innocence

2011-03-29T08:44:00.003+08:00

Actual Children’s Answers to The Question “What Is Love?”

“Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.” - Chrissy, age 6

“Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.” - Terri, age 4

“Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.” - Danny, age 7

“Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss.” - Emily, age 8
“Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.” - Bobby, age 7
“If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,” - Nikka, age 6
“Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.” - Noelle, age 7
“Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.” - Tommy, age 6
“During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn’t scared anymore.” - Cindy, age 8
“My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don’t see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.” - Clare, age 6
“Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.” - Elaine, age 5
“Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Brad Pitt.” - Chris, age 7
“Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.” - Mary Ann, age 4
“I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.” - Lauren, age 4
“When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn’t bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That’s love.” - Rebecca, age 8
“When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.” - Karen, age 7
“You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.” - Jessica, age 8
Source

Saw this on Tumblr and I felt that there's a need to share.

SO. HEARTWARMING.

Birthday Week!!!

2011-03-28T21:14:00.005+08:00

9:15PM

I just had a dream and I'm in love with it. Its all about treating me like a Princess hahaha, probably one of my deepest desires.

What's a Monday without Monday Blues? Surprisingly, my Monday Blues didn't kick in because I was all pumped as it is my birthday week! Although its self-declared, I still feel pretty special. What I expect was birthday plans lined up all week but I guess I have to stick to Friday and the weekend due to school. I can't wait for the end of this week!!!!!!!

Today, I received my first two presents from Marcus and Joan. FROM ETUDE HOUSE BRO, enthu much! All vanity haha, lip balm and hand cream. Loved it. Xie xie ni men.

Detached

2011-03-27T17:27:00.008+08:00

6:47PM

Because I can have emotions too.

I am feeling detached from my church friends. They have their thang while I have mine, I don't fit in anymore and not going to bother. I'm not involved in things they discuss across the table about and that made lunch seem very pointless then. A lot of events took place and I'm glad they were all successful. Sometimes I try to find time to catch up but I can never find them. Always running around endlessly doing errands, they don't ever stop. One's always on her emotion roller coaster, always wondering what version of her I might get every week. Another one's always spending time with her bf and her important duties as a chairman. Me? I'm becoming more of an introvert. I became less participative in lessons, activities and gatherings. No wonder.

My life is contradicting. I am in my fellowship's committee, I am suppose to make those who are under me feel the love of Christ, the church and most importantly, the fellowship, but I am the one who really need to feel the love now.

٩(×̯×)۶

Snippet of my narcissistic self: I am learning how to draw my brows and I kinda got it right just now. Need a few more practice and I am good to go but there's a little problem. My brows are actually uneven.... fuck that China lady. No wonder charge $5. BTW my birthday falls on next Sunday thus making the whole of next week my (self-declared) birthday week. Yay me! Hope everything goes well and I need some surprises.

Shufffflin

2011-03-27T00:58:00.004+08:00

do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do

shufflin' shufflin'

That girl shuffled with Louboutins.

DOPE SHIT!

Broken

2011-03-26T23:50:00.006+08:00

11:52PM

Here I am, succumbing into my internet addiction again.

Yesterday I promised myself on Twitter (... i know) that I wouldn't touch the computer today but look what I'm doing now. Nope, I don't blog on my iPhone unless I'm on an aeroplane heading somewhere. Talking about aeroplanes, my mother is going New Zealand with my sister some time in May. I didn't know anything before my nanny's daughter tell me about it. Seems like some outsider knows more about my family happenings. I laughed it off but to be honest, I am pissed. Real pissed. My hatred for both my mother and sister increases, like there's a fire in my chest flaming in rage. Silly it may be but although we don't talk nor acknowledge each other's existence, I feel a need for them to tell me what. is. fucking. happening. That selfish need of mine. I never tell them what is happening in my lonesome life though.

So their trip will be around three weeks. Even if everything's fine between us and I am able to go along, I won't. I'd be having my Mid Year Exams then. So I should supposedly be fine. Aywhere they go, how much fun they had, what new experience they gain, should not affect me at all. I'm not suppose to be included anyways... just.. FUCK THEM ALL.

There's church tomorrow and Rachel's joining me.

(Y)

Sunshine

2011-03-25T11:33:00.000+08:00

I opened my eyes
and watched the sunshine
it had been out all night
to relax and unwind

there will come a time gigantic
waves will crush the junk that I have saved
when the moon explodes or floats away
I'll lose the souvenirs I made
la la la

I lay down on the grass
and let the insects do their thing
she covered me with wings and
held my head and said 'poor thing'

there will come a time gigantic
waves will crush the junk that I have saved
when the moon explodes or floats away
I'll lose the souvenirs I saved
la la la

Capability

2011-03-25T10:02:00.003+08:00

10:44AM

Punctuality.. something I need to learn

It's not easy to be punctual if you're addicted to sleep and the Internet. Like me. Very crazy indeed if you think about my state now. 2011 is actually a very important year for me and here I am skipping school and still surfing the web. Am going to sit for a major exam in October and that will contribute to my very faint future that I cannot see now. Everyday in school is golden, every lesson is pure essence and yet people like me just cannot be serious about it. Maybe it is human nature to procrastinate, even for the most important thing. I see my peers fret over how they don't understand a certain part of a chapter in Chemistry. I stayed calm. I know my goal and I know what to do but I don't do it. Contradicting you might say. A day without me doing what I am suppose to do properly (e.g homework/coursework), some thousand more kilograms of stress piles on inside me.

I set some New Year resolutions in the beginning of 2011 and till date, I have not really fulfill one of them. The worse thing is, they are not even unrealistic. Things like getting all my homework done, be punctual, grow in spiritual life and manage money well. Nothing too much from me to ask for, in fact, they are BASICS. So disappointed in myself or even to some peers too.

Its time for me to do some actions instead of rattling on and on on how disappointed or fail I am. Got to get going. Reflect.

Inspirations

2011-03-24T23:45:00.000+08:00

1213am

My insides are churning all the time.

Are what I call inspirations, imitations? I follow styles I love on people. All types of people; junior, senior, friends, family, strangers, uncle, auntie. I want to be original. Is by combining all my inspirations from people and putting on myself count as original? I used to think I have a personality but I don't think so now. I'm just plain Jane, nothing special at all.

A new start.

2011-03-23T20:18:00.001+08:00

Probably gonna start updating this space of mine again. Don't worry, I have only just change the link of my past. Its thesecondunicorn. All I want to do now is to save some money, lose some weight, gain some workload. Top of my list.

Its my birthday week next week.